We all have mobiles, laptops, or computers at home. How is the memory disk of each of them when purchased? Clean and unused- so is a child’s brain. A child is born with a fresh mind, a new psyche, and like a new computer hard disk, we can store anything of any size in it. Children are followers and indeed they follow their parents first, next the family, and later come school, environment, peers, friends and that’s how the influence and impact begin. A toddler watches and contrasts himself with his peers, friends and there begins the story, the narrative of tantrums. And being a mom, we must know quick and good strategies for how to deal with toddler tantrums.
What Is a Tantrum and the Reasons for It?
Tantrum or ‘acting out' is natural conduct or a response of a toddler to anything unwanted, undesirable, disappointing or frustrating. It is an unpleasant, disruptive behavior to express if something is not happening the way they want. Sometimes might be an emotional outburst too, a passionate upheaval too. Normally, these tantrums last for 15 minutes and toddlers move on to something else soon after that.
Smacking, tossing things, scratching, hitting things or people, even biting, gnawing, disturbing others, screaming are few tantrums, kids use for fluctuated reasons.
What could be the reasons for this behavior or outburst?
- Perhaps there are no reasons at times or is it just to grab attention.
- Screen habit could be a troublesome one these days. Now and again, when we put off the screen a baby may act like something significant being grabbed from him.
- Younger siblings at home might make a toddler feel unwanted and then they have their ways to get noticed.
- Even if a sibling takes away a toy, the other one finds it troublesome to cope with the situation.
- Lack of sleep or not eating enough food could cause temper tantrums. Stress and hunger make it difficult for a toddler to express his need.
- A transitional change, momentary change, similar to one in the day-by-day schedule at that point, prompts temper tantrums.
- It is the ideal opportunity for tantrums if it's the completion of a play game or not getting what they are craving.
- A child going through strong emotions of anger, shame or fear may express them in form of temper tantrums.
How to Deal with Toddler Tantrums?
The explanation could be any, the most important aspect is to how to deal with toddler tantrums?
As a mom we feel satisfied when toddler is smiling, playing and mingling well but the situation turns topsy turvy when the toddler is lying on the floor, embarrassing if this happens in public places.
It is laborious and daunting to pause or cease these tantrums right away. Keep your stress at bay and attempt self-regulating. Take a deep breath and read ahead to discover some strategies and ways on how to deal with toddler tantrums. Truly, there is nothing right or wrong while dealing with tantrums- one way might work for a toddler and may not be a decent choice for others. Let’s get to some of the best strategies to how to deal with toddler tantrums.
- Stay Calm - The first and foremost is to stay calm. Relax, unwind or pretend that way. The anger and resentment return on tantrums could worsen the situation and it would be harder to hang it up.
- Limit the words - No compelling reason to disclose any circumstance to the child. Remember the act is for 15 minutes and the toddler will proceed on to the next thing soon after.
- Create a distraction - Try removing the child from the existing situation. For example- If the tantrum is acted for the screen, try involving the child with some other curricular activity like coloring, playing outdoors.
- How about a hug or a cuddle? - We feel amazingly relaxed when in the worst of moods we get a hug. It seems our stress is gone away and so does it happen to kids. Nestle the child, hug him tight in your laps, and let the stress pass away.
- Help them express their feelings, their sentiments too - We can help a child reset their emotions by acknowledging their feeling. It is obvious to get upset when we fall while running or cycling.
- Let him be angry and destress - Anger is also a way to destress at times. Allow him to yell once and don't attempt to reason it. Wait for the tantrum to get over and avoid being there.
- Take Charge - Build-in an extra line when needed, take charge if required. Need not fulfill the extra want if not needed. When a child wants to play with water in the tub for a long time, try to pull out the plug instead of lifting the child.
- Utilize inward judgment and be consistent - Sometimes yes, sometimes no for tantrums, worsen the situation and create more problems. It is hard, but a No means No.
- Offer Choices - There is no space for contentions on irrelevant things. Instead, offer choices for something better.
- Ignore the situation - Ignorance is bliss and here, indeed it is. Avoid the child and make no interaction. It is the most difficult strategy being a mom but is the grounded instrument. A child is closest to the mother at an early age.
- Take to a safe place - It could be embarrassing if any tantrum happens in public places. Yet, stay mollusk and take the little one to a safe place just to keep any eye, but do not surrender for any unreasoned demand.
- Praise the child - Praise and acclaim the toddler when they stop the tantrum.
Yelling, hitting, begging, bribing are few poor strategies and once you give them to the demand of the child, the same way will happen again. Children have a better psychology understanding than an adult. Think before the act.
However, sometimes tantrums are good and acceptable as well. Don’t we feel good when we cry sometimes; that is because tears help us release the stress and so is the way of a tantrum by a child. Even a child is relaxed after passing a tantrum- glad.
At the point, when a toddler is figuring out to accept and acknowledge things differently or learning to understand NO, adjusting to not getting all demands fulfilled, they pitch tantrums and it is just an expression of hope they feel about the particular situation. Sympathize with them on being upset but be adamant and consistent at mom’s end - No means no. Not in the least, emotionally attack a toddler else they will learn the same after all it is parents whom they follow first.
Parenting is a journey filled with joys, fun, challenges, and frustration at times. The road to the destination is bumpy in this journey. But how would we relate destination here? A child when achieves the best, earns more, obedient, able to settle with responsibilities and lots more.
Yes, that’s how we judge! And now let’s go back- where this journey begins from? The time when child is unborn in the womb, or from the birth or is it measured from it is time to go to school.
Well, every one of us has different answers to this. As far as few theories on parenting has been drawn, we get to know that 0 to 5 years are the most crucial to lay a strong foundation. So let’s begin from there.